My Monthly Visitor (From Space)

Saints Alive! (Or How About Going Green!) | March 17, 2009

So…

I’ve been trying to explain to Trog why all the hubbub about St. Patrick’s Day.  Here’s the breakdown of our conversation.  (To keep it simple, what he said is in italics.  Oh, and in case you’re just turning in, Trog is the alien that visits my brain every month.  He’ll be here a few days.)

The reason for this celebration is an exalted man?

Yes, St. Patrick.

What kind of name is St. Patrick?

Well, saint is used by the church to designate that the person did something magical.

I thought that was what Santa meant.

Well, it does in reference to Santa Claus, because it’s a mash up of St. Nicholas.  You remember mash ups?  It’s like those videos I showed you on YouTube.  You know that one that mixed Ten Things I Hate About You and The Ten Commandments.

(For those of you unfamiliar, here it is.)

I cannot fully appreciate the foolishness of “the mash up.”  I hope to one day, but this is only my fortieth visit.

Trust me.  It’s a riot.  And we’re up to forty months, hey?  And you’ve never been here for St. Patrick’s Day?

The dates of my previous visits began March 18th, 2008, March 20th, 2007, and March 21st, 2006.

You were never hear for St. Valentine’s Day either?

St. Valentine?

Never mind.

If St. Nicholas becomes Santa Claus, why is it not Santa Rick?

To some, I’m sure he is.  Heh.  You been Santa Rickroll’d.

Rickroll’d?

Never mind.

What did St. Nicholas do?

I think he lead rats out of Ireland by playing a flute.  Or was it snakes?  Did he use a flute?

I thought I was asking the questions.

We’re done.

Why do people wear green?  Why do they drink beer?

They wear the green to match the beer.

Oh.  Duly noted.